Free Falling


Do you recognize that human shaped dot in the center of the photo?

That’s Yago in a long-distance zoom.  Notice anything indecent about his attire?


So I’m sitting at the playground breastfeeding Río, when Yago decides it’s diaper liberation time.  Off comes the offending garment.  Then he whips his shorts down around his ankles.  With a serial killer grin, he takes off  down the sidewalk as fast as he can hobble.

As I watched his bare arse disappear over the horizon I considered my options.  To chase, or not to chase, that is the question.  Hhhmmm.   Not.  I had another child dangling from my boob at the time.  Also, during this sensitive point in his emotional development,  I couldn’t resort to meer physical capture.  Delicate, intensive parenting was required.  So I pretended I didn’t know him.

Instead I feigned interest in photographing passing seagulls and hoped like hell that he would turn around before all the dog walkers figured out who he belonged to.  After all, how far could he get with his pants around his ankles?

As it turns out, pretty far.  The guy can really motor while hobbled.

Then the inevitable happened.  Still in a flat-out streak, he turned to see if I had taken the chase bait.  BOOM.   Faceplant into the concrete.  At which point I did have to run down there, second child still boob-dangling, to assess the damage.  The road rash inventory tallied a couple scabby knees and elbows, but all the boy bits were intact.

In retrospect, it was entertaining.  At least for the neighbours.

It marked both the high point and the low point of my day.

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7 comments

  1. Now, you wonder what Yago feels he learned from the day:
    1. Look where you are streaking?
    2. It only hurts when you look back?
    3. Do something about those pesky pants!

    Thanks for the streak of laughs. 🙂

  2. Just found your blog from some links. Hilarious!! The pictures are great, too. I deal with that chase or not to chase question all the time. Luckily, I’m not breastfeeding anymore.

    Susan

  3. Love the pics, even if they are blurry. What music would have been playing at you were “streaking” down the sidewalk with your boob hanging out?

  4. Brilliant – so glad you caught all of this on camera. You must have so much material to bribe him with when he’s a teenager!
    P.S. Arriving in Spain next week … watch out!!

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