Do you recognize that human shaped dot in the center of the photo?
That’s Yago in a long-distance zoom. Notice anything indecent about his attire?
So I’m sitting at the playground breastfeeding Río, when Yago decides it’s diaper liberation time. Off comes the offending garment. Then he whips his shorts down around his ankles. With a serial killer grin, he takes off down the sidewalk as fast as he can hobble.
As I watched his bare arse disappear over the horizon I considered my options. To chase, or not to chase, that is the question. Hhhmmm. Not. I had another child dangling from my boob at the time. Also, during this sensitive point in his emotional development, I couldn’t resort to meer physical capture. Delicate, intensive parenting was required. So I pretended I didn’t know him.
Instead I feigned interest in photographing passing seagulls and hoped like hell that he would turn around before all the dog walkers figured out who he belonged to. After all, how far could he get with his pants around his ankles?
As it turns out, pretty far. The guy can really motor while hobbled.
Then the inevitable happened. Still in a flat-out streak, he turned to see if I had taken the chase bait. BOOM. Faceplant into the concrete. At which point I did have to run down there, second child still boob-dangling, to assess the damage. The road rash inventory tallied a couple scabby knees and elbows, but all the boy bits were intact.
In retrospect, it was entertaining. At least for the neighbours.
It marked both the high point and the low point of my day.